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AWG Secular 12 Step Self-Esteem Group 🚀


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Zoom access and meeting times Meeting description Workbook Readings
Zoom access and meeting times

Meetings are every Tuesday from 11 am to 12 pm Eastern US Time. See Meeting Time in a Different Time Zone (normal calendar)


* Zoom link not working? Search the meeting ID below in the Zoom meeting database and then use the code to sign in: 

Meeting ID: 824 1142 4876
Code: 781927


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Meeting description

This is a secular 12 Step meeting focused on self-esteem recovery for late-identified autistic women and members of all other marginalized genders (nonbinary, gender fluid, MTF/FTM trans, agender, autigender, and more). 

We meet each Tuesday on Zoom, practice the AWG 12 Steps using the AWG 12 Step Workbook, share in response to weekly readings, and participate in the optional co-mentorship program if we so desire. 

It is not mandatory to turn on your mic or camera. Coming to listen is totally fine. By taking part, we hold space for others, and ourselves, to participate in a way that is manageable for us as we exist right now.

It is not necessary to actively be doing the AWG 12 Steps in order to be a full participant. Any contact with the group and its resources can be beneficial as long as it’s sustainable for each of us as individuals. Many of us participate simply by attending meetings.

As we participate in this meeting over time, we might find ourselves seeking to…

  • Find our own concept of self-esteem and grow toward it
  • Come to discover a more realistic sense of our place in the world
  • Reassess our relationships, especially in terms of our responsibilities towards ourselves and others
  • Come to understand personal boundaries, their roles in our lives, and how to develop and maintain healthy boundaries
  • Understand the concept of nonviolent detachment and how and when to enact it
  • Develop more manageable lifestyles
  • Develop a sense of self that leads to more health, well being, and manageability in our lives
  • Release others from the responsibility of defining or reinforcing our sense of self-esteem
  • Form personal goals about self-esteem and self-concept based on our own understanding of our own needs, as they exist today

AWG 12 Step Self-Esteem Readings

Self-esteem versus self-confidence

Monday, August 31, 2026

Knowing that self-confidence and self-esteem are two different things helps me to access my sense of self-esteem

Something that has been helping me recently is differentiating between self-esteem and self-confidence.

Self-esteem, to me, means things like:

  • Do I respect myself? 
  • Do I believe I have an intrinsic worth as a human being, the same worth others have? 
  • Do I stand up for myself when necessary? 
  • Do I feel able to have equal relationships with others, neither controlling nor being controlled?

Meanwhile, self-confidence, to me, means things like:

  • Do I believe I will succeed in something specific that I attempt? 
  • Have I had experiences that tested me and showed me my capabilities and resilience? 
  • Can I gain experiences over time that will increase my belief in my success in certain areas? 
  • Do I feel surer of success in some areas than in others?

Thinking about the differences has led to some realizations:

  • Self-esteem doesn't have to be earned. It's been hard to wrap my mind around that. I feel like I'm getting something for nothing. But we are all born with a right to self-esteem. 
  • At times when I'm not feeling a lot of self-confidence, I can still feel my self-esteem telling me that I am worthy of respect and consideration regardless of performance. 
  • My self-confidence can go up and down depending on where I am, who I am with, and what I am doing. However, it's possible for self-esteem to remain consistent no matter what else is happening. 
  • Self-confidence can be good and important, too. But no matter how high self-confidence becomes, it's not a replacement for self-esteem.

I personally am often tempted to place more emphasis on self-confidence as a measure of mental health than self-esteem. At unhealthy times in my life, it has replaced self-esteem. Perhaps that was because I was measuring self-worth through performance and potential. In my mind, higher self-confidence was linked to achievement, which was linked with deserving love. I felt I wasn't valuable if I wasn't achieving. Reminding myself that self-confidence and self-esteem are two different things helps me to access my sense of self-esteem.

What about you? How do you see the relationship between self-esteem and self-confidence?

Share questions:

  • What, to you, are the similarities and differences between self-esteem and self-confidence? 
  • How does self-esteem make you feel? How does self-confidence make you feel? 
  • Do you ever conflate self-confidence and self-esteem? What is that like?
  • What life experiences have improved your self-confidence? 
  • Has your self-confidence improved in any areas since learning you are autistic? 
  • Any tools, strategies, or resources to share? 
  • Anything else to add?
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AWG 12 Step Self-Esteem Workbook

Step 1

We admitted that despite our efforts, many of the factors affecting our sense of self and self-esteem seemed out of control, leading to increased unmanageability in our lives.

Step 2

Coming Soon

Step 3

Coming Soon

Step 4

Coming Soon
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